Design the worst update possible

[Luna_Tuna]

You farmer develops schizophrenia and you MUST buy your pills online for 500$ each pill, if you don’t take them everyday you start experiencing symptoms

 

[HedgehogIII]

You farmer develops schizophrenia and you MUST buy your pills online for 500$ each pill, if you don’t take them everyday you start experiencing symptoms

I’m getting married to Haley!
Ummm…who’s Haley?
my…my fiance
uhhh…what

 

[Luna_Tuna]

I’m getting married to Haley!
Ummm…who’s Haley?
my…my fiance
uhhh…what

Whos Haley?

 

[JamaicaGinger]

you can now no longer eat any fresh vegetables, E G you've picked a parsnip, you can't eat it yet silly! You need to put it through the cleanselizer* first, and after that wash it in the sink at Willy's shack, and then you can eat it for %50 less of the stats!

*The Cleanselizer™ costs $1.25 per use, terms apply.

 

[WanderingWendaline]

There are now limited time (as in real time, not SDV time) seasonal events. To get the most out of it, you need to buy a pass with real money. Even with the pass, half of the event is still locked behind a paywall

 

[HedgehogIII]

Linus is hostile

 

[Luna_Tuna]

Linus is hostile

And he throws rocks and trash at you

 

[HedgehogIII]

And he throws rocks and trash at you

He controls the bears to rip you apart

 

[Luna_Tuna]

Someone should turn these ideas into a mod

 

[HedgehogIII]

Grandpa gives you $100,000 of credit card debt in his will

 

[WanderingWendaline]

Grandpa gives you $100,000 of credit card debt in his will

This but Grandpa has $100,000,000 of debt from gambling at the casino

 

[Lenora Rose]

There are now limited time (as in real time, not SDV time) seasonal events. To get the most out of it, you need to buy a pass with real money. Even with the pass, half of the event is still locked behind a paywall

I see you, too, are tired of all the little "free" online games that advertise incessantly...

 

[Hollyfox]

you can only earn money through the saloon games. (by collecting coins)

 

[HedgehogIII]

when you enter ginger island your hair changes color

 

[WanderingWendaline]

There are no more character customization options. You can only look like a mannequin

 

[BeenASon]

There are no more character customization options. You can only look like a mannequin

And you can't name your character anything other than null and your favourite thing is cow fat. No pets either.

I see you, too, are tired of all the little "free" online games that advertise incessantly...

Most gamers are tired and that includes me. That's why I don't play them lol.

 

[Lenora Rose]

Most gamers are tired and that includes me. That's why I don't play them lol.

I played exactly one of them, which was less annoying about it than all the ones I tried once, went ugh, and deleted and/or have since ignored. (IE, it lets you advance without spending, just slower.) Then I hit the last currently existing level of the storyline and stopped until they actually send an update that advances the main plot. Which is overdue.

The worst thing is, the basic gameplay of some of the worst offenders would be fun if it weren't set in microtransaction hell.