I can’t decide who to try and marry!

sapphic_citrus

Greenhorn
Hi so I’m very new to this game. I’ve started it a couple times but never committed but I think this time I’m gonna stick with it. My problem though is that I can’t decide who to marry! I was gonna go with Emily and I already have her to 6 hearts but then I accidentally ran into one of Penny’s heart events and now I really like her and I can’t choose! I was just wondering if anyone had any opinions on which one I should choose? Maybe if one is better later on or something? Just wanted a second opinion and to see what other people think!
 

qwerty

Farmhand
You can always get married and then get divorced if you feel that Emily or Penny isn't the right spouse for you.

There is no need to rush as there is plenty of opportunities to get married to other bachelorettes/bachelors.

In my current save file, I married Sam and had two kids but now I have divorced him and am living with Krobus!

So yeah take it easy and just try and be friends with as many NPCs as you can :)
 

hexnessie

Farmer
In all my months of playing the game, across many different farmers, I've never married yet. I like them all fine, I'm "in progress" of selecting the right candidate on several of my farms, but I've never really gotten into it so much. There are so many more interesting things to do!

What I'm saying is you can enjoy the game 100% without ever deciding whom to marry. Just play it out, date a bit, enjoy your options!
 

imnvs

Local Legend
There is no best spouse. Honestly, imho, on your first play through you should marry the person you like the most.

And the thing is, you can make friends with everyone, get all the marriageable candidates up to 8 hearts, see all their heart events, then give bouquets to all of them and date all of them and get them up to 10 hearts and see the heart event for that too. (All marriageable villagers have heart events at 2, 4, 6, 8, 10 and 14 (only reachable when married).) Then you can decide which you like the most and marry them. :)

One word of caution, though: if you do date every female candidate or date every male candidate... there is a possibility that they'll get mad at you. If you happen to carry around a good luck charm, though, you may avoid such.
 
In addition to which character you like most, there are several things to consider that are related to game play.
Each spouse adds their own room to your house. Depending how you want your home to look, that might matter a lot.
They have different loved and liked gifts. It might be easier or harder to woo someone quickly depending what you have to give.
Once married, they will each give you different gifts. Depending how you're playing, they might be very useful, or not at all.
Also, some of the spouses have heart events that give unique game items or make changes around the town. Again, depending how you want to play and what you do in your game, it might or might not affect you much.

From a game play perspective I think Emily is the best spouse. She continues to send friendship gifts in the mail in addition to spouse gifts. And her special item includes boots with decent combat stats.
 

sapphic_citrus

Greenhorn
You can always get married and then get divorced if you feel that Emily or Penny isn't the right spouse for you.

There is no need to rush as there is plenty of opportunities to get married to other bachelorettes/bachelors.

In my current save file, I married Sam and had two kids but now I have divorced him and am living with Krobus!

So yeah take it easy and just try and be friends with as many NPCs as you can :)
Ok thanks!!! I didn’t know you could divorce lol so maybe that can be a last resort
 

sapphic_citrus

Greenhorn
In all my months of playing the game, across many different farmers, I've never married yet. I like them all fine, I'm "in progress" of selecting the right candidate on several of my farms, but I've never really gotten into it so much. There are so many more interesting things to do!

What I'm saying is you can enjoy the game 100% without ever deciding whom to marry. Just play it out, date a bit, enjoy your options!
That’s a good idea! I’m used to just marrying someone asap in farm games but that’s a good point to just let things play out. Thanks!
 

sapphic_citrus

Greenhorn
There is no best spouse. Honestly, imho, on your first play through you should marry the person you like the most.

And the thing is, you can make friends with everyone, get all the marriageable candidates up to 8 hearts, see all their heart events, then give bouquets to all of them and date all of them and get them up to 10 hearts and see the heart event for that too. (All marriageable villagers have heart events at 2, 4, 6, 8, 10 and 14 (only reachable when married).) Then you can decide which you like the most and marry them. :)

One word of caution, though: if you do date every female candidate or date every male candidate... there is a possibility that they'll get mad at you. If you happen to carry around a good luck charm, though, you may avoid such.
I’ll try not to date them at the same time lol !
 

sapphic_citrus

Greenhorn
In addition to which character you like most, there are several things to consider that are related to game play.
Each spouse adds their own room to your house. Depending how you want your home to look, that might matter a lot.
They have different loved and liked gifts. It might be easier or harder to woo someone quickly depending what you have to give.
Once married, they will each give you different gifts. Depending how you're playing, they might be very useful, or not at all.
Also, some of the spouses have heart events that give unique game items or make changes around the town. Again, depending how you want to play and what you do in your game, it might or might not affect you much.

From a game play perspective I think Emily is the best spouse. She continues to send friendship gifts in the mail in addition to spouse gifts. And her special item includes boots with decent combat stats.
Thank you!
 

nicodeux

Farmer
I agree with the main advice that was given to you: just enjoy the game and marry the character that you like the most.

If you wander a bit on these forums, you will see that "the best character to marry" differs significantly from one user to another. Some of my relatives that I introduced to Stardew Valley each decided to marry characters that are at the very bottom of my own list.

It is very likely that you will made another farmer and be able to try out other marriage candidates. And if you don't, you can still divorce and try another one.

So, just enjoy the game. Make your first run precious with the gift of discovery.
 

imnvs

Local Legend
I’ll try not to date them at the same time lol !
Well, stopping dating requires giving them a "wilted bouquet" which loses you hearts with that person... so you may want to avoid doing this serially for that reason.

Think of it this way: dating really means looking about, going on dates with multiple folks to see who you were the most compatible with. Some folks these days forget that. Seriously, ask every married person you know how many people they dated before they found the person they married. You'll find that it's actually pretty normal to date more than one person.
 
I agree with PoppyForPenny, the Spouse Rooms matter quite a bit. You can see them all here, other than Krobus, and can see Krobus' on his page.



Some notes: Shane's is just an outright worse (significantly worse!) version of Abigail's. It's hers if she was a slob, had no musical talent or interests, no hamster, and no sense of adventure. Alex is the only one with Green Flooring, Krobus is uniquely Blue/Green in both the walls and floors, and Leah's is very red. Beyond that, they're all mostly brown, if you're trying to color coordinate. For Penny vs Emily specifically, you're choosing between a pinkish, kinda empty room with a parrot and palm tree for Emily, vs a blueish room full of bookshelves for Penny. If you really like books, parrots, or palm trees, maybe that contributes to the choice.

It can also make sense to base it on what best fits thematically with your character. Penny is bookish, and all about kids, learning, and community. Emily is free spirited, and is all about crystals, dancing, and making clothing. If either of those themes appeal more to you as a person or make more sense for your character, then go for it! As others have said there's no "wrong" choice, and you Can get divorced if you have regret later. However doing so has (semi) permanent impact on how those you've divorced interact with you, so I wouldn't go around just marrying and divorcing everyone, personally.
 

sapphic_citrus

Greenhorn
Hi so I’m very new to this game. I’ve started it a couple times but never committed but I think this time I’m gonna stick with it. My problem though is that I can’t decide who to marry! I was gonna go with Emily and I already have her to 6 hearts but then I accidentally ran into one of Penny’s heart events and now I really like her and I can’t choose! I was just wondering if anyone had any opinions on which one I should choose? Maybe if one is better later on or something? Just wanted a second opinion and to see what other people think!
I have another question if anyone sees this!!! If I break up with someone and then decide I wanna date them again can I get back together with them or do they dislike me forever? Like I know that when you get divorced they don’t like you anymore unless you wipe their memories
 

nicodeux

Farmer
No, they'll drop a couple of hearts, but they will talk to you and accept gifts, so you can bring them back up.
However, if you marry and divorce someone, he/she will no longer accept gifts from you and will have negative texts when talking to him/her.
Fortunately, there is some witchcraft that can allow you to make him/her forget that your marriage was a failure, starting anew your love relation if you fancy it.
 
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