I try to play local coop on my mac(on newest version of mac) and i got the cabins and everything and i can use my controller for other games, steam detects it but it just doesnt join no matter how many times i press the required buttton.
As you note, there are some Steam games that will work with controllers on M1 Macs, but that's because they rolled their own controller support instead of relying on SteamInput. SteamInput (which is Steam's controller library) uses a kext-based controller driver, but kexts were deprecated in MacOS Bug Sur. If you have an Intel Mac it's possible to use a workaround to force the legacy kext driver to load, but M1 Macs have never supported kexts (and, even if they did, Rosetta wouldn't be able to translate something as low-level as a kernel extension).