If you could be one NPC in Stardew Valley, who would you be?

[Caviar]

(not including NPCs from mods)

 

[HaleyRocks]

Kent, i am afraid... Shame on me, i know. That is who i would be, had i wanted to be realistic.

Whom i want to be, though... Hmmm, it's Sebastian. I have most of his habits, minus the programming and tech-savvy thingies, which would be highly useful to me.

My future self though, might at some point, become somebody like Linus, instead.

 

[ISSsloth]

I would probably be Gunther, or Penny if I need someone giftable. I couldn't see myself working anywhere in the valley besides at the library, and he has that sweet hat.

 

[PerfectionWhaleFarm]

Gus -
Making food for everyone sounds like lots of fun, and I'd love to see everyone's satisfying grin after emptying all their dishes. Pam is just collateral, and I'm sure a lovely non-NPC will come by the salon someday to sort out any awkward debts for her

And all walks of life wander into the salon so I'd probably encounter a lot of many different things and hear about many different life experiences.
It sounds like a dream job for me if I weren't in this equally fun job irl atm... (although the reality is probably much harsher because I know the food industry is notoriously hard to succeed...)

 

[Lew Zealand]

Defaulting to Lazy as Farmer Bobbi's defining characteristic, it needs to be Gil of course. Rarely moving a muscle, leaving the heavy lifting when the fool Farmer passes out from exhaustion to Marlon, unimpressed with the Farmer's Monster Eradication progress, even leaving the meager rewards for said progress to Marlon to dole out, Gil exists purely as an antidote to those overzealous who feel that Stardew's daylength is too short. He is so uninvolved that it's not even possible to compute his mass as gravity deems it pointless to interact with the only thing in existence with no apparent velocity. As such, time passes even more slowly in the gravity well antithesis known as Gil. As the heat death of the universe slowly yet inexorably approaches, even it is checking it's watch to see if Gil got held up in traffic.

As the Patron Saint of Meh, Gil exists as an aspirational goal for Farmer Bobbi and when the time comes, she hopes that Gil is merely a Title of Honor instead of a single person. That once all the Gil molecules have arrived at their final resting state, Gil the Sixty-Second will ascend to a higher plane of restful existence unknowable to mere mortals, and that another shall take his place in the Chair Which Should Not Rock. Marlon is clearly aiming for the coveted role of Gil the Sixty-Third but Farmer Bobbi is gonna give him quite a run walk sit slouch collapse melt for his money.

That chair will be mine.

 

[PerfectionWhaleFarm]

Defaulting to Lazy as Farmer Bobbi's defining characteristic, it needs to be Gil of course. Rarely moving a muscle, leaving the heavy lifting when the fool Farmer passes out from exhaustion to Marlon, unimpressed with the Farmer's Monster Eradication progress, even leaving the meager rewards for said progress to Marlon to dole out, Gil exists purely as an antidote to those overzealous who feel that Stardew's daylength is too short. He is so uninvolved that it's not even possible to compute his mass as gravity deems it pointless to interact with the only thing in existence with no apparent velocity. As such, time passes even more slowly in the gravity well antithesis known as Gil. As the heat death of the universe slowly yet inexorably approaches, even it is checking it's watch to see if Gil got held up in traffic.

As the Patron Saint of Meh, Gil exists as an aspirational goal for Farmer Bobbi and when the time comes, she hopes that Gil is merely a Title of Honor instead of a single person. That once all the Gil molecules have arrived at their final resting state, Gil the Sixty-Second will ascend to a higher plane of restful existence unknowable to mere mortals, and that another shall take his place in the Chair Which Should Not Rock. Marlon is clearly aiming for the coveted role of Gil the Sixty-Third but Farmer Bobbi is gonna give him quite a run walk sit slouch collapse melt for his money.

That chair will be mine.

That brought a chuckle out of me!